Friday, 23 May 2008

TV: On why my husband is, by definition, grumpy

I don't know why I spend so much time bemoaning the fact that my husband is the epitome of "grumpy". He is literally a bear with a sore tooth half the time (he had a tooth out the other day in fact).

Looking at the characters I find myself attracted to, what was I expecting - the male version of Mary Poppins?

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Chris Perry's whole purpose in life is to save the life of the Charmed Ones and indeed the world. He is driven and focused and oh so petulant when he doesn't get his own way.

Stephen's whole purpose is to clean the house it seems. He is driven and focused and oh so petulant when he doesn't get his own way.

Logan Echolls was the grumpiest, most serious character in Neptune - why on earth would Miss Bubbles aka Veronica Mars fall in love with him?

Stephen was the grumpiest, most serious character in Northcliff - why on earth would Miss Bubbles aka me fall in love with him?

Essentially pure at heart, Will Scarlett has one aim in life and that is to defeat the Sheriff of Nottingham. Such serious aspirations leave no room for mirth or humour, thus making Will the most serious of the band of Merry Men.

Essentially pure at heart, Stephen has one aim in life and that is to watch every single F1 race or premier league game on television. Such aspirations leave no room for mirth or humour so heaven help you if you make plans during a match or race.

Sam Tyler had an accident and landed up back in 1973. Is he mad, in a coma or back in time?

Being married to me makes Stephen wonder where on earth his life went wrong and makes him wish he were mad, in a coma or back in time.

John Mercer has a chip on his shoulder. He did what he had to do to protect his sister and there is no damn way on earth he is going to crack a smile for you.

Stephen has a chip on his shoulder. Something deep and mysterious happened in his life otherwise how else do you explain why there is no damn way on earth he is going to crack a smile for you?

 

Therefore, in conclusion, if Stephen were anything but a grumpy old bear, I wouldn't have found him attractive in the first place.

And they both lived happily ever after.

The end.

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